You live in a room full of darkness. The room inside your head. It’s lonely.
You entered to hide but there’s only blackness inside – reflection of nightmares and fears.
The darkness wraps around you – you can’t wash it off with soap…you are never clean enough.
It has you screaming… but no sound coming out.
You crawl in the corner to hide… but even walls seem to be against you.
“Just hang in there” – they will say not seeing that you’re falling to pieces.
The anxiety that never stops…it will make you go mad trying to remove that itch… Your skin is your enemy.
It will run thorns through your spine – everything hurts but it’s only you.
You locked yourself inside…Are you a person worthy of coming out? With that darkness around you, with that spikes down your spine…who needs this ugliness? Maybe a creature like this deserves to leave in darkness?
You’re in it alone…no one can see from the outside the monsters that hide in the darkness…and only you know that monster you are scared of the most – is part of you.
You walk around, meet people… but wherever you go you still carry that dark room with you. You smile “I’m fine” but that lonely soul inside is curling up in the last ray of light.
Quoting J.K Rowling: “Of course it is all happening inside your head. But why does it mean that it’s not real?”
Depression and anxiety are real.
They are not something you can just “shake off”. It is not poetic, it’s painful. With the worst pain in the world – the one that hurts your soul.
It is nothing to be ashamed of. All of us can get locked up in darkness.
It is not something to ignore – no one deserves it, no one can deal with it… no one should.
If you see someone entering the dark room or living in it – help them. Help them see that they can come out, deserve to come out and are loved outside.
Text, concept and photography – Victoria Krundysheva photography